Remember To Feel Real
27th December 2009 with 62 comments
I added an icon tutorial. I hope you guys like it. 
Sometimes when I am cleaning my room, I come across something that I want to throw out, but I can’t, for the life of me, do it.
That always happens to me. 
More often than not, it’s something that is of sentimental value. Which probably seems acceptable, until you get to a few things.
Gelato spoons?
James and I prefer gelato to ice cream. There’s less fat and more water. We used to eat it every week. It was a little expensive though. And I kept all the little plastic spoons each time. Maybe that’s a little sad. But I rinsed them and washed them and kept them in a little container.
It’s things like these that I really should throw out but I don’t. 
About five years ago, I started keeping a “Memory Box”. It was just a cardboard box. I filled it with all these little things that meant a lot to me. Some little notes from friends, some photos and other things that just meant something to me.
I had to move all the stuff into a new box when it no longer fit. But I still kept adding things to it. Usually they came up after I cleaned my room. Instead of pondering for hours what to do with these “things”, I tossed them into the box.
About two years ago, I stopped putting things in it. I don’t know why. There was less to put in. Things meant less to me.
About two years ago, I had gone through a rough patch. We all go through rough patches. But now that it’s in the past, I’ve kept it there. I don’t like bringing up something from the past that hurt or tore me up. Things stay in the past for a reason. They’re there because they happened, and there isn’t anything you can do to change that.
Don’t dwell on what might have been.
When I went through that tough time a few years ago, I stopped “collecting” memories. I stopped saving them and trying to remember them with physical, material aids. Hence, I stopped putting things in my Memory Box, because there was nothing I wanted to remember.
About two years ago, my Memory Box started to get full and I couldn’t find another box to replace it. I tied it roughly with a ribbon, and to this day, haven’t opened it. It collected dust, and sat behind my record player speaker for a long time.
But you can’t run away from your past. Even if I had burned this box, I still remember everything inside it. I still remember the moments I cried, the moments I laughed, the moments I was angry, the moments I was sad, the moments I was happy.
Now I think that you can’t totally depend on materials and “things” to remember. I don’t think you can have memories solely based on something you’ve kept or collected from the past.
Sometimes memories are pushed to the back of your mind, and their remembrance is fuelled by something else – something you do, something that happens. I think that memories – true memories – are ones that stay in your heart and ones you don’t ever forget.
It’s in the current blog.
If someone else in your fam has one, I’m sure they would allow you to borrow it. 
Ngaw, I wish I had one of those. Usually all my memories are on my laptop in the form of pictures . The cards and meaningful little things that I get from friends, I just keep them in some binder or something less formal than a memory box. That’s a sweet little tradition that you carried on for years though. 
gelato. (: It’s so much better than ice cream but there aren’t many gelato places here =P I love ice cream though too. Both are my two loves 
Oops. 
a memory box , i never would’ve thought of that ! You should pass it on to you children (if u have any)
It’s nice. Mine’s just… like. Weird. xD
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Jamie
27th December 2009 at 10:39 am
OMB, I’m the first to comment how in the world did that happen? Anyway, you are so right about the memories lasting forever in your heart and mind. I agree with that.
I never did keep a memory box. I guess I should’ve and saved all the letters I received from my friends but I didn’t. But yeah you had a nice idea of keeping a memory box, even if you knew what went inside of it.
As far as the gift goes you’re very welcome. I made it on the spur of the moment and yeah I do have a new layout. I like it so I think I’m gonna try to keep it up for quite a few weeks.
Pfft on your brother. He sounds a bit greedy. But anyway, I’m sorry you and your mother has to go through his growth spurt. That must suck.
I’m thinking about getting a desktop computer and than saving for a trip to out of the country and california for like a week. That’s all I can stay is a week out of the country because it’s a rule for people on social security income like me. Rats.
I also wanted to go bald at one point in time, that was when I was dying my hair constantly and thought if I go bald, my natural color will come back. Nope I managed to get it back on my own with out going to the extreme. My friend did though she shaved off all her hair and became emo. I guess she was already emo, but she became more emo when she started at my highschool. Getting drunk, sneaking in boys, having parties, ditching school. And what not. It was crazy times. Now she’s better, working a full time job, and everything. The last time I saw her was at “C” Buffet, with her family and that was a couple of months ago.
So what Christmas came and went, what did you get? I got some old 1950′s lamp which is cool I love it. And I got $200.00 which now I have $320.00 because I gave $20.00 and $100.00 to my dad for my stash. I got some oriental looking trinket things, and a calendar. So I made out like a bandit this year. lol.
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